Home Bound; For Now

11 months ago, I boarded a one way flight to Sydney, Australia on a 462 working holiday visa with no plans mapped out, not knowing a single soul, going into a country where I only know of Sydney Opera House and nothing else, only carrying a 20kg backpack with me. Tired of my old job and not knowing what career path I wanted to head toward, I decided to travel all over Australia to my heart's desire to do some soul searching. Not only has this journey been inspiring and extreme, but I've also grew and developed as a person. The things I've done, the mess I've made, the troubles I've encountered, the challenges I've faced, the food I've tasted, the coffee I've drank, the metric system I've learned, the Pokémon I've caught, the tears and laughters I've shared, the people I've met, the friends I've befriended, the Jesus I've devoted to, the one I've fell in love with, the home I've second'd, nothing short of what was needed for myself. I'm coming home not only bringing my six packs... of Tim Tams, but I'm bringing home a better person, a better son, a better friend, a better potential employee (hire me pls), a better me. Farewell, Australia; for now. I'll be back very soon and when I come back, I'll take you on like a storm! Peace, latah!

New Zealand: The Week that felt like Months!

Boy what a week it has been...! Marco, Satie, and I are finally back to Melbourne after a week long in New Zealand that felt like we were there for months...!

As a slacker that I am, I waited until very late to book everything for the trip and making stupid mistakes. We were going to book a Britz campervan which was supposedly one of the best campervan companies in New Zealand. I was checking on Wednesday morning and there were still 4 people campervans. I went out for something and when I came back, it was all booked out! I rushed around the internet searching for alternatives and eventually booked a campervan with a company named JUCY. They have average reviews, but it's better than nothing because we wanted to experience living in a campervan. As for the flight tickets, we were going to book from Sunday to Sunday, but I didn't want Satie to come home on Sunday morning tired and still have to go to school, so I decided to book Saturday to Saturday. Later that day, Marco asked which days have I booked the flight tickets and I said Saturday to Saturday. That was when I immediately remember that Satie is taking her EILTS on Saturday.... Oh geez. I was so scared that I would be a disappointment again so I hurried and try to change my booking for Sunday to Saturday. Turns out that I booked the most basic ticket which is not flexible for changing flights, so I had to pay extra to fly on Sunday and extra for flight changing fees. So the flight tickets for all three of us turned out to be AU$1800 instead of AU$1500 and the campervan turned out AU$900 instead of AU$800. The flight ticket was okay because my previous booking was cheap enough to make up the difference since flying out Sunday was supposedly more expensive to begin with, The campervan is a $100 extra, but I convinced myself that there's no use blaming myself.

So everything is booked and we're ready to go! Everyone was excited for the trip because Marco needed some time to walk away from Australia. Satie haven't really had a legit vacation since she came to Australia. I... Well, I wanted to do a bit more travelling before I head back home. The day finally came, Satie finished her IELTS with average confidence in passing, and we were all packed and ready to go. Our flight was 12:05AM Sunday, so we took an Uber to the airport at 9:30PM Saturday so we don't bother Adrian. My first time using Uber, there were no UberBlack around so we ended up taking an UberX which was luxurious riding... We were like, wow! It's a Mercedes Benz! The bill? Came up to be $100...... Luckily, it was my first time using the app, so we got $20 off. We got to the airport and Hungry Jacks before we boarded the plane.

5:50AM Sunday 26, June:
We arrived Christchurch Airport safely and early. JUCY does not open until 8AM, so we chose a corner in the airport to rest up before we head out, but we got kicked around by securities at the airport because we're not supposed to be sleeping around haha... We ended up moping around until 10AM before we finally got to the rental company to pick up the car. We were excited to pick up the campervan until I did all my paper work and went out to review the vehicle. That's when everyone's face dropped. It was a big green van. Satie described it as the Scooby Doo van. Inside was not as luxurious as the YouTube video we saw for the Britz campervan. I can see Satie and Marco's faces the whole time thinking "Are you serious?" I tried to fake my smile and laughter so the poor guy going over how to use the campervan won't feel bad. I keep saying, "Sweet! Cool! Yeah, it's nice! Yeah yeah...!" Lol... It was not good and I felt horrible, but the campervan was actually not that bad once we settled down with it. We drove out of the parking at 10:30AM and finally started our trip. We headed straight for Christchurch CBD so we can stock up on food, eat lunch, and head out. Things can't get any worse. It was a cloudy rainy day; a sad mood where we just want to stay in and relax. Once we got to Christchurch, our face dropped again. Apparently, Christchurch had an Earthquake a few years back. Everywhere in the city, there were a lot of construction and broken down buildings everywhere. There were graffiti tags everywhere, void spaces of buildings being rebuilt, rarely do we see anyone walking around the city, and the weather completed the mood of Depression. The city looked so depressing! The whole time we were there, we were feeling like, "Okay! We've had enough of New Zealand! Lets go home because 

A New Journey Awaits!

I have a flight in 3 hours to catch flying to Christchurch, New Zealand! :) I'll be going with Satie and Marco. I know it will be a great and fun trip. It will be a good time for me to take the time and reflect on life.

I've been so lazy this past week. I kept telling myself to finish my previous blog, but I never got around to it. I've been doing planning for this New Zealand trip as well as following the market regarding the exit of UK. It's amazing how one country's decision can impact the whole world. I ran into some stupid things while booking flights and a campervan, but I guess it's okay. I take it as a lesson and know what to do next time.

Recently, I've been thinking a lot about returning to Melbourne for longer term. This trip, I've been experimenting a lot with cooking. While living here with Marco that has been studying pastry, I've been taking interest in cooking with him. I actually have fun cooking because he gives me tips and the way he cooks look intriguing. With a creative side in me, I was thinking maybe I can come back to Melbourne to study pastry and eventually get PR here. Haha... I don't know if that's really what I want, but I need to start making my own decisions. Maybe I'll go back home for a year, see how the environment treats me, then make a decision based on that. It's good enough to have the idea rather than doing long term planning. At least now, I know I have the courage to make a change when I am unhappy because I have already took a big step to quit my job to come here. I love Melbourne. I feel like I have a family here with my church friends. Everything here is great, or so I want to think so. :) God has a plan for me, so there's no reason to beat around the bush about something insignificant.

Anyways, I need to start getting ready to head out. I'll keep this updated as much as possible. I won't be bringing my laptop, so I can free up some space.

Blessed

Melbourne is too engrained into me. I feel like this is my home. My family is here and I want to stay here because this is where I feel happiness. Although I do not have any source of income right now, I am blessed to have friends around me that will continue to pray for my well being and Adrian continues to let me live at his place free of charge.

Today was Sabbath Day and I went to church again. Church never fails to excite me and gives me hope and love. People there loves my presence. Today, I learned that I need to be patient. We give in to instant gratification too easily now a days. We need to develop a sense of patience so we can achieve something that we long for. There might be a lot of obstacles, but as long as we continue to work hard and don't give into bad habits, we will achieve what we desire. 4 people got baptised today and their testimonies were wonderful. People come from different backgrounds and life experiences, but God has somehow touched their heart and give them hope. The love for God is so powerful that they decide to dedicate their life long journey to let God guide them. Their testimonies were really inspirational. Who knows, maybe in a few years, I will be making the same decisions as these friends to devote my life long journey into God's hand.

Cooking

NZ

Home 

Walking with Christ

Although we do not always walk a smooth path in our lives, I believe that He has a reason and plan for the things that we experience in life. My trip has been a big roller-coaster with ups and down, loops and falls, sideways and back. As we continue to walk this life, we learn new things with each step that we take. I believe it's not the end of the world when you fall, but a beginning of something better because we have learned something new to add value into our lives.

I have finally came back to Melbourne, a place where I can call my second home because I have a family here. It's great to be back with Christ. Friday night, I went to care group and even though there weren't many people attending due to final exam week, those that were able to attend were so excited and happy to see me. Today, I went to church and same occurrence happened. Everyone was so excited to see me. This feeling of comfort and joy is everlasting. It's unfortunate that Kevonnie is departing from the church because she has finished her semester of exchange here in Melbourne. She is a super awesome person. She is super confident, funny, nice, talkative, smart, and always put a joy on your face. Have a tendency to speak before she thinks though that makes her genuinely a great person that speaks her mind. We had a farewell party with her after sermon and everyone that attended had nothing but great things to say about Kevonnie. Although the farewell party was for Kevonnie, I also felt a sense of joy in my heart too. Most of the church consist of university students and probably age ranging from 18-40, but they're all have such big hearts. For the longest time back at home, I just believe this world is cruel and dark. Everyone fends for themselves; survival of the fittest. But here we are, bringing back all the memories of those that were created with Kevonnie. We hold those that are dear to us in our minds and it continues to live on regardless of the duration of the event. Humans are weird, huh? You see people killing people on the news everyday; one mass shooting per day in the US. Then you see a one big family in a small city where everyone genuinely cares about each other, supporting each other, praying, embracing, encouraging, helping, and loving each other regardless of appearance, background, beliefs, ideas, nationality, or anything. God has the power to bring us all together.

When things weren't going well and everything seemed to just step on me, I was starting to feel home sick and really wanted to go home. Home is where we have a supporting environment and where we can feel safe. But who would have known that the place I return to turned out to be Melbourne... I was going to leave Australia, but the home that God brought me back to was here. I'd be lying if I say I pray everyday. I pray when I remember and not just pray for my well-being and desires, but to thank Lord for his blessing that I am alive and well. I thank Him that although I have been going through a lot, I still have friends and families by my side that are willing to support me and gives me courage and hope to keep my head up and continue my path. Haha, I feel like hardcore Christian talking about God this Jesus that, but I really am not. I believe they're really guiding me. As long as you do your part, leave it into His hand and He will make the right decision for you because He knows you more than you know about yourself.

I have another good news! Due to the car rental company not replying to my emails and calls to attempt to get supporting documents for my travel insurance claim, I have filed a dispute with my credit card company to challenge the AU$6,200 that they have charged me for damage recovery. Just Thursday night, Marco asked me if there were any follow ups because it has been two weeks. I checked Wednesday but there were nothing. I checked again and BAM! The car rental company has decided to refund me ~AU$4,200. I don't know if it was because the travel insurance company and the credit card company are targeting them making them scared, but I'm glad that I was refunded at least some amount. AU$2,000 is still a lot of money, but I honestly did caused some damages to the car. I'm really glad that things are working out for me now... I'm back in Melbourne with those that I love. I'm with my church family. I received some money back so I can be more flexible instead of being super stingy with my spending. Although I cannot find any jobs, I want to spend a little bit more time in Melbourne before I really head back home. I can't bare the thoughts of leaving this place..... Although there are pain in my heart.

I rather not know for the rest of my life so nothing will ever happen than to know and know that it can never happen...

I've been trying to convince myself that due to all these things happening and I basically cross the line of losing someone's trust, I am not suitable nor ready to have a significant other. I want to believe that if I continue to improve myself as a person overall, the right one will appear naturally. But... I see her everyday and my heart would start to ache that I can never be with her besides being a very good friend. What is it that we seek? Is friendship not enough? Why do we need to fall in love? Today was a wonderful day. Everything was going great and I was really happy to be able to spend Sabbath Day with those who cares. Adrian, Marco, and I even went out for dinner and ice-cream. Everything was going great until I started noticing all the love that exist on the streets. People embracing. People holding hands. People kissing. It got into my head again. The questionnaire of "Why" drenched my mind. Once again, I used League of Legends to escape from the world of reality into a land of empty thoughts. Focus on my game play so I don't have to think.

There's More to Learn in Life

This trip around Australia has nothing less of what I really need in life. An adventure, an experience, a lesson, a hope, a chance... To develop and become a better person. I mean, that's what I told my friends that is what I wanted to gain out of this trip -- to become a better person.

I lost track of my goal and continued to live life how I used to live it, careless and irresponsible. I thought I was a happy go lucky mature individual, but I guess that I haven't really grew up at all. I'm still stuck at my immature stage and pretend everything is okay and great. Selfish and lazy.

This trip back to Melbourne, I thought I fell in love and was heart broken. I think like a typical "nice guy" because I'm one of them. I thought I was a nice guy but they don't see that and just go for bad guys because they're more exciting. But in reality, I'm not who I thought I am and definitely not as genuine as I thought I would be. I have been so careless that I lost the trust of someone that was very dear to me. At the time of what I thought was despair, I reckless as to saying ridiculous things that does not even matter. Actions speak louder than words. Henry, you can't fix things by just saying stupid things. Slowly patch it up with your actions and regain the person's trust.

Decisiveness. It has been one thing that I have been trying to tackle for a really long time. Libra is known to be indecisiveness, but I believe that if we have the will for change, we can overpower silly fortune telling and be what we want to be. I mean, I've went from taking half a year to decide on which phone to buy to taking 2 months to quit my job and coming to Australia.

Every day is a lesson and every chance is an opportunity for growth and development. It's never too late to learn and this trip has done nothing but teach me more of what I need to be. The earlier I learn, the faster I grow. I've been sheltered for far too long. Everything was given to me so I didn't have to learn about these life skills. My whole trip had a purpose. He listened and brought me here. Thank you.

有恁快走恁快。。。

Dude, he's crazy!

Sometimes, I feel bad for living at his place. He doesn't charge me any money for living there and he usually won't let me pay for groceries unless I go and buy my own thing. He lets me cook once in a while, but he said he rather cook himself because he wants to get better at cooking. So I was like whatever, he's a friend and he's okay with me doing that, so I'll let him come to my place if he ever comes to Massachusetts. Mind that he's probably in his 50s I think... Or that's what he looked like.

One night, he prepared dinner. He called me out to eat and told me that the rice has gone cold, so I better hurry and eat it. I tasted it and it was cold. But rice don't get cold 2 minutes out of the rice cooker.
Me: "Did you scoop it out of the rice cooker for a long time?"
Him: "No, I just scooped it out and put the food on top of the rice."
Me: "Okay. Just to let you know, you don't have to unplug the rice cooker immediately once the rice finish cooking. The cooker will keep the rice warm for a very long period of time as long as you keep it plugged in. The rice won't overcook."
Him: "No! I didn't take the rice out for a long time! I just scooped it out and put the food on top! I don't think you appreciate my cooking, is that it?!?!!? I'm trying my best to cook and you just complain!"
Me: o______________o "I never said I don't appreciate your cooking. I always thanked you for cooking."
Him: "Now you want to start an argument with me??? You don't have to eat it if you don't appreciate it!"
Me: .____________.

Yesterday, when I was about to leave the house.
Me: "Hey, I'm going to head out to the library."
Him: "Okay. Do you want to use the front door?"
Me: "No, it doesn't matter. I'll use the side door since my shoes are here already."
Him: "Here, let me open the front door for you. Use the front door."
Me: "Nawww, it's fine. I'll use the side door since it's already opened and unlocked."
Him: "Are you trying to start an argument with me?!?!?? I don't think you appreciate living here!"
Me: o_________________________________o *dude wtf*
Him: "You know, I'm just being nice and letting you stay here! You don't appreciate living here, huh?!?!?? You can leave anytime!"
Me: .____________. "No, I don't not appreciate living here. I just don't think it's such a big deal where I get out of the house from... Fine, I'll use the front door. Sorry."
Him: "Now you're getting me all worked up! It's a courtesy thing to have my guest go out from the front door!"
Me: *dude calm the fuck down. It's no big deal*

Because of these, I started to feel uncomfortable. Not only that. The other day, we were talking about Christianity and I brought up how Christianity is against gay people and I don't agree that gay people are bad. I have plenty of gay friends and they're genuinely good people. He then revealed to me that he's gay and told me about his experience and sex life with girls and guys and I'm like........ o.......k............. I was totally fine with it, whatever. The first day I reached Perth and came to his house, he mentioned that his bathroom wall paints are chipping and ripping off because of too much moisture since the exhaust fan doesn't really do anything. His solution was to keep the bathroom door a little bit opened so the steam would dissapate so it won't cause the paint to chip even more. I ignored that because I like my privacy when I'm taking a shower. Even in high school gym class, I didn't feel comfortable with open showers where everyone just showered together. One night, I was taking a shower and he didn't even knock. He opened the door a bit and told me that he wants the door opened up a little so the steam won't ruin the paint. I was like dude, wtf o_____o At least knock....

I told Marco about all this and he told me to book a ticket and leave as fast as possible.
To be honest, I think he's a nice guy. But it got to the point of awkwardness that I don't even feel comfortable saying anything back to him fearing that I'd offend him. He likes talking and in a conversation, I like to be giving replies to give a sense of I'm paying attention. I don't like having no input or anything to say back to him. But it has gotten to that point of no return. I was waiting for Rafael to get back to me if I could get a job at Gensuke back in Melbourne, but I booked a flight that very night to get back to Perth. I don't think I feel comfortable staying here with him anymore. The flight was a bit expensive, but I calculated it and it'd be more expensive if I lived in a hostel for four more days to catch a cheaper flight. So here I am at the airport waiting for my flight back to Melbourne. No job. No money. No honey. T^T But that's okay. I wanted to go back before I depart anyways. Melbourne is where I've created a lot of memories and friends that I truly hold dear to me for my lifetime.